I will just introduce this topic. My friend JJ has suffered from PTSD ever since his days in Vietnam and has written 2 books about it. Mine cannot compare with his and did not occurr in a war torn country but in the medical arena.
2 weeks ago I shredded 6 large full boxes of all that crap, the hearings, the proceedings, the horrible suspensions, the unbelievable loss of constitutional rights, the humiliation, the stress, the terrible toll on my mind, body and soul. and yet it was so bad that I cannot believe that I lived through it. A person of less strenght and faith could not have made it I think now. The problem has been that it was so bad that no one could, would or will believe what happened between 1985 to 1995. But you know what: it has made me a stronger person knowing that I did live through it; that fact in itself gives me strength; if I dwell on the dark side that leads to depression and regret; knowing that my efforts did bring changes for the well being of children in this community gives me the upside; the suffering I endured makes it-- for lack of a better word--worthwhile. Jesus suffered so much more, that I cannot imagine. I can always look to Him for comfort and what He holds for me at the end here and the beginning in His Kingdom.
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